A Story from Sedwick...

Oh what a freaky freakin morning.

So last night a friend of mine sends me a message that he’s going to return some things that he borrowed.

I go to bed around my usual time and I’m in that semi-conscious state when the dog starts barking like crazy and going nuts. I hear the front door open and think to myself “oh … he must have meant he was returning the stuff tonight.” I promptly roll over and go to sleep.

I wake up this morning and go through my usual wake up routine. Let the dog out, have a smoke, check the cat’s food, make some coffee, etc.

I head to the couch to drink my coffee and check my email and such. I look at the couch and wonder to myself …

“Why the hell did he leave a pile of clothes on my couch?!”

“Wait … why is there blonde hair sticking out of the top of those clothes?!”

“Who the HELL is this woman sleeping on my damn couch?!”

“Do I grab a weapon or two?! Do I call the cops?! Do I just wake her up and kick her out?! What the HELL is going on here?!?!?!”

I opt for the “wake her up and kick her out option”. She rolls over, smiles up at me and says “oh … hi!”. I’m completely dumbfounded and the conversation goes something along the lines of this …

“Who the hell are you?!”

“I’m (whatever name she said I can’t remember now)”

“Why are you in my house?!”

“uh … uhm …”

“Do I know you?!”

“Yeah we met last week I think it was.” (Which is a neat trick since I was in Florida last week)

“I don’t think we did.”

“Yeah … we met at a uhm a friend’s house I think.”

“I’m pretty sure we didn’t.”

“Well I can leave if you’d like.”

“Uh, yeah, I’d like.”

She then proceeds to stumble a few times getting up, stumbles around the living room looking for her purse and keys, while I keep telling her that she needs to leave. At one point she said something along the lines of …

“Ok, ok, relax … it’s not like I’m robbing the place or anything.”

“Yeah, I’m just really confused since I have no idea why you’re here.”

“Well I’m confused too!!!” she said.

As I finally corral her out the door she says, “Where am I?” I told her what town she was in and she asks, “Am I at the beach?”. I point her in the direction of the beach and lock the door behind her.

It’ll be a LONG time before I forget to lock the front door before going to bed!!!

So that’s how I got to wake myself up this morning. I just had to share.